An-Nisa 4:31–36

Righteous Deeds: Kaffarah کَفَارَہ of Minor Sins

Kaffarah is what makes amends, expiation. So the meaning is that righteous deeds will be taken as Kaffarah for minor sins which will thus be written off, resulting in reward instead of punishment and Paradise instead of Hell. This is in accordance with authentic ahadith where it has been stated that when a person makes wudu for salah, the act of washing each part of his body becomes the Kaffarah for sins; the washing of the face becomes the Kaffarah for sins committed by the eye, the ear, the nose; gargling becomes the Kaffarah for the sins of the tongue; washing feet a washes way the sins of the feet - and when he walks towards the masjid, every step he takes brings with it the Kaffarah of sins.

Major Sins are forgiven by Taubah تَوبَہ alone

From the verse, we find that the expiation of sins through righteous deeds such as wudu, salah and the rest, which appear in ahadith, concerns minor sins. As for major sins, they are not forgiven without Taubah (Repentance); and for minor sins, the condition is that one should have made the effort to stay away and remain safe from major sins. This leaves us with a note of warning - if someone, while staying involved in major sins, goes on performing his wudu' and salah, then this wudu' and salah and other righteous deeds will not at all expiate for even his minor sins, let alone the major ones. It is a warning that when a person appears on the fateful Day of Resurrection, carrying the heavy burden of his major and minor sins, he will find no helping hand to make his burden any lighter.

It will be recalled that some major sins were mentioned in the previous verses alongwith the warning of severe punishment for those who commit them. It is a peculiar style of the Holy Qur'an that when it warns of punishment against a sin, it is generally followed by some aspect of persuasion towards obedience.

In the present verse too, a particular Divine reward has been mentioned and people have been persuaded to acquire it by staying away from major sins, in which case, Allah Almighty will forgive their minor sins on His own. Thus, cleansed of all sins, major and minor, one could look forward to entering the home of honour and peace, the garden of Paradise.

The two kinds of sins

This verse tells us that there are two kinds of sins. Some of them are kabirah, that is, major sins; others are saghirah صغیرہ ، (termed as Saiyyat, in this verse) that is, minor sins. He, who musters enough courage and succeeds in staying away from major sins, has been given a promise by Allah Almighty that He will forgive his minor sins on His own.

Now, the act of staying away from major sins also includes the act of fulfilling all obligations (fard and wajib) because neglecting or abandoning obligations is a major sin in itself. Thus, we come to the conclusion that if one dutifully fulfills all obligations and succeeds in saving himself from all major sins, Allah Almighty will overlook his minor sins.

Defining Major and Minor Sins

The word, "Kaba'ir" used in the verse is the plural of 'kabirah' meaning 'major sins.' Before we proceed further, we should understand the nature and identification of 'major sins'. Also, we should know the definition of minor sins, and their number. Being an impor-tant subject, scholars of the Muslim community have devoted regular books to throw light on this subject from various angles.

Let us, first of all, realize that sin, in the absolute sense, is the name of an act which is against the command and the will of Allah Almighty. Starting from this particular point, you will be able to see that the sin known as 'saghirah' or, technically, a minor sin, is, in fact, no minor sin for that matter. To disobey Allah Almighty and to oppose His will is, invariably, a grave crime. Therefore, based on this view, a large number of scholars of the Muslim community have ruled that every disobedience of Allah and every opposition to His will is nothing but 'kabirah' or major sin. The distinction between 'kabirah' and 'saghirah', major and minor sins, is made only when these are compared to each other. It is in this sense that the blessed Companion, Sayyidna ` Abdullah Ibn ` Abbas ؓ has been reported to have said: کُل ما نھی عنہ فھو کبیر which means that 'Any act forbidden by the Shari’ ah is a major sin.

In short, a sin which is technically known as minor does not mean that people should go about indulging in it neglectfully, indolently or just ignore it as something ordinary. On the contrary, the fact is that a minor sin, if done with nerve or heedlessness, does not remain minor anymore - it becomes a major sin. A good example of a major and a minor sin, as given by some sage, is that of a small scorpion and a big scorpion, or that of a large ember and a tiny spark, for man cannot bear the pain given by any of these. Therefore, Muhammad ibn Ka'b al-Qurazi said that the greatest act of worship offered for Allah is to give up sins. The ` ibadah or worship by people, who offer prayers and remember Allah, yet do not give up sins, is not accepted. The famous mystic, Fudayl ibn 'Ayad said: 'The lighter you take a sin to be, the greater it will become with Allah as a crime.' The most righteous elders of the Muslim community used to say: Every sin is a courier of kufr which invites people to manners and morals typical of disbelievers.

According to the Musnad of Ahmad, Sayyidna ` A'ishah ؓ wrote a letter to Sayyidna Mu` awiyah ؓ which she said that a servant of Allah who disobeys Allah Almighty finds his fans become fault-finders, and friends turn into enemies. Heedlessness towards sins is the cause of man's permanent ruination. It appears in an authentic hadith that the Holy Prophet ﷺ said: When a true believer falls in sin, a black dot appears on his heart. If, after that, he repents and seeks forgiveness from Allah, this dot disappears. If he does not repent, this dot keeps on increasing, so much so that it covers his whole heart. In the Qur'an, the name given to this dot is 'rayn', as in كَلَّا ۖ بَلْ ۜ رَ‌انَ عَلَىٰ قُلُوبِهِم مَّا كَانُوا يَكْسِبُونَ that is, their evil deeds have rusted their hearts - 83:14.

However, it is necessary that there be a method to distinguish between sins in terms of corruption they cause, evil results they bring and harmful outcome they produce. Thus, it is because of this need to differentiate that a certain sin is called 'major' and a certain other 'minor'.

Major Sins

The definition of 'kaba'ir', as indicated in the Qur'an and Hadith and as explained by the most revered elders, is that a sin on which a Hadd or punishment has been prescribed in the Qur'an and/or Sunnah to be enforced in this present life or on which words of curse or la'nah have appeared, or on which stern warning of Hell has been mentioned, are all major sins. Similarly, every sin the evil outcome of which is equal to or more than a major sin shall be counted as a major sin. Also, a sin done with a rebellious attitude or done as a permanent habit is also included in the major sins.

Someone said before Sayyidna Ibn ` Abbas ؓ that the number of major sins was seven. He said: 'Not seven. Say seven hundred, which is better.' In his book Al-Zawajir, Imam Ibn Hajr al-Makki (رح) has given a list of all such sins with their full explanations, sins which are included under kaba` ir in accordance with the definition given above. The number of major sins listed in his book reaches upto four hundred and sixty seven. The truth of the matter is that some scholars have considered it sufficient to count prominent major sins only and thus the number they have come up with is lower. Others who went in details and dealt with all divisions and subdivisions of the subject came up with a higher number. Therefore, this is not much of a contradiction. The Holy Prophet ﷺ has himself pointed to many sins as being major. Then, as appropriate under given circumstances, he has also named them in threes and sixes and sevens or even more elsewhere. From this, the scholars of the Muslim community came to the conclusion that the purpose is not to determine any particular number as a universal statement. Rather, each number mentioned in a hadith relates to particular occasions or circumstances where that particular number was deemed appropriate in the given situation.

In a hadith of al-Bukhari and Muslim, the Holy Prophet ﷺ has been reported to have said: I warn you against the top ones from among the major sins. They are three in number - to associate a created being as a partner in the divinity of Allah, to disobey parents and to give false witness or to lie. In yet another narration of al-Bukhari and Muslim, it has been reported that someone asked the Holy Prophet ﷺ as to what could be the greatest of all sins. He said: 'That you ascribe partners to Allah although He has created you.' He was then asked as to the greatest of all sins after that. He said: 'That you kill your child for fear of his sharing in your sustenance and that you will have to feed him.' He was again asked as to the greatest of all sins after that. He said: 'Committing adultery with the wife of your neighbour.' Since the protection of the family of a neighbour is the responsibility of all human beings very much like the protection of one's own family, therefore, the gravity of this crime becomes twofold.

According to yet another hadith reported by al-Bukhari and Muslim, the Holy Prophet ﷺ said: 'That someone uses abusive language for his parents is also one of the major sins.' Surprised, the noble Companions who asked: '0 Messenger of Allah, how is it possible that someone starts using abusive language against his very own parents?' He said: 'Yes. A person abuses the parents of another person as a result of which the later abuses the parents of the former. This too is as if he had abused his own parents, because he was the one who became the cause of those abuses.'

As in a narration of Sahib a1-Bukhari, the Holy Prophet ﷺ has counted - shirk (ascribing partners to Allah), unjust killing, eating up of the property of an orphan by false means, devouring income from interest, deserting the battlefield of jihad, false accusation against chaste women, disobedience to parents and the desecration of the Holy Ka'bah - among major sins. In some hadith narrations, the eventuality - that a person winds up living in a country of disbelievers (dar al-kufr) and emigrates to a country of believers (dar al-Islam), but later, leaves the country to which he has migrated and goes back to live into the country of disbelievers - has also been ruled as a major sin.

There are other narrations of ahadith where some of the forms of behaviour cited below have been included in the list of major sins, such as, taking a false oath, holding back water in excess of one's need and refusing to share it with those who need it, to learn magic, and to practice magic. The Holy Prophet ﷺ has said, 'Drinking is the greatest of major sins'; he also said: 'Drinking is the mother of all shameful deeds,' because once drunk, man can fall into any conceivable evil. There is another hadith where he said: 'The gravest major sin is that one imputes to his Muslim brother a fault which stains his character.' According to one hadith, one who brackets two salahs (time-bound prescribed prayers) at one time without an excuse approved by the Shari’ ah has committed a major sin. It means that he did not perform a salah at the time it was due, but performed it as qada (missed) prayer along with another salah. Some ahadith narrations declare that losing hope in the mercy of Allah Almighty is also a major sin; and so it will be in the event if one becomes careless or daring enough to forget all about His punishment and retribution. Another narration rules that making a will to bring loss to an inheritor or to reduce his share in the inheritance is also one of the major sins.

And it appears in a narration from the Sahib of Muslim that the Holy Prophet once spoke the words: 'Destitutes, losers, they are ruined.' He repeated this three times. Sayyidna Abu Dharr al Ghifari ؓ asked: '0 Messenger of Allah, who are these unfortunate people?' He replied: 'One: a person who lets his trouser or wrap or shirt or robe hang all the way down below his ankles; two: one who spends something in the way of Allah, then publicizes his favour; three: one who, inspite of his old age, indulges in shameful deeds; four: one who, despite holding a position of authority, tells lies; five: one who, despite having a family, waxes proud; six: one who gives his hand of allegiance in the hands of a worthy Imam or master just for the sake of material gains.

Concluding in the same vein, we refer to another hadith from al-Bukhari and Muslim which proclaims that the back-biter will not be admitted into the Paradise. And a hadith in Nasa` i and the Misnad of Ahmad enlarges on the theme by saying that some kinds of people will not be admitted into the Paradise, that is, the drinker, the disobeyer of parents, the unjustified severer of relations with kinsmen, the publicizer of a favour, the diviner of the unseen through jinns, satans and other mediums and the dayyuth (دَیُّوث), a wittol or cuckold who is so contented with his shamelessness that he never stops his wife and family members from going the way of immodesty. And a hadith from the Sahih of Muslim says that la'nah or the curse of Allah is for one who sacrifices an animal for anyone other than Allah.

In the injunctions of inheritance appearing previously, it was mentioned that, given the conditions, for a male there is a share equal to that of two females. There are other proved aspects of male precedence as well. So, Sayyidah Umm Salmah رضی اللہ تعالیٰ عنہا once said to the Holy Prophet ﷺ Our share in the inheritance is half. Then, there are such and such elements of difference between us and men...'

Her purpose was not to raise an objection. Rather, she wished to be a man and to deserve the merits restricted for men. There were other women who wished: Had we been men, we would have taken part in Jihad and the merit of Jihad would have been ours.'

A woman asked the Holy Prophet ﷺ 'A man gets a double share in the inheritance and the witness of a woman is half as compared with a man - does that mean that we shall be getting a half reward for all of our acts of worship?' Thereupon, the present verse was revealed in which an answer to both these statements has been given. The answer to Sayyidah Umm Salmah ؓ was given by 'and do not covet...' and the answer to the last-mentioned woman was given by 'for men there is a share...'

Coveting the Unacquirable

In this verse (32), coveting things, traits and merits given to others has been prohibited, for they are not acquirable by effort. The reason is that when a man finds himself lacking in wealth, comfort, beauty, merit, knowledge and similar other states of being, he naturally experiences a surge of envy which urges him to come, at least, at par with that person, or, if possible, be ahead. But, he does not always have the capability or power to make his wish come true because there are merits and excellences which have nothing to do with man's own efforts and acquisitions. They are simply the blessings of nature, for example, being a man or being the scion of a prophet's family or having been born in the family of a ruler or having been born beautiful. So, one who does not have access to these blessings - can never obtain them by effort even-if he were to spend a whole life-time devoted to that pursuit. A woman cannot become a man, nor can one choose to be born in the family of a prophet, or change his physique - become tall and handsome, acquire All beautiful features of his choice - because, this is not within his power. He simply cannot acquire these in the real sense, no matter how much he struggles with his medicines, treatments and devices. Consequently, when he finds himself incapable of matching the other person, his inner self starts playing with the idea that it would be wonderful if such blessings were snatched away from him (the other person) as well, so that, he too becomes either equal or lower than him. This is envy, a terribly, shameful and damaging trait of human morals, which is the cause of so many disputes, disturbances, killings and ravages in this world.

This verse of the Holy Qur'an closes the doors of disorders by saying: وَلَا تَتَمَنَّوْا مَا فَضَّلَ اللَّهُ بِهِ بَعْضَكُمْ عَلَىٰ بَعْضٍ. It means that Allah Almighty, in His infinite wisdom, has blessed people with all sorts of merits and excellences. He gave someone a particular quality, then gave someone else yet another quality; less to some, more to some others. In this matter, everyone. should rest pleased with his or her destiny and stay clear from the envious desire to become the possessor of the other person's merits and excellences, for the end-result of this game of desires is nothing but a biting sense of personal loss, and of course, that awful sin of envy.

It may sound a little simple, but the truth of the matter is that anyone Allah Almighty elects to be a man should be grateful for it, and anyone He elects to be a woman should be pleased with being just that, realizing that, had she been a man, may be, she could have failed to fulfill the responsibilities placed on a man, and would have thus ended up being a sinner. Then, anyone created beautiful by Allah Almighty should be all the more grateful for having been so blessed; and, anyone lesser in looks should also not grieve thinking of the good that may lie hidden behind this destiny, for being blessed with beauty does not necessarily guarantee good. It might have the recipient land into some unwelcome state of trial or corruption. Again, anyone who is a true lineal descendant of the Holy Prophet ﷺ should thank Allah Almighty for the great blessing of this lineal connection; and, anyone who does not have this connection should neither worry about it, nor should he go about longing for it, because this is something which cannot be acquired by effort, and if one still insists on coveting it, what he would get involved with will be nothing but sin and the gain he would make would be nothing but a broken heart and an aching soul. So, rather than pine for a lineage one does not have, the best policy is to think about one's own doings. Let these be good and righteous. Once a person enhances himself with such spiritual strengths, he can be ahead of those with higher or better lineage.

Striving to excel others in good deeds is different

There are verses of the Holy Qur'an and the sayings of the noble Prophet ﷺ which exhort people to excel each other in good deeds. In other words, this is an open field in which it is all right to look at the trail of merits and excellence left by others. Indeed, people have been persuaded to make all possible efforts to acquire them. Now, this relates to deeds within man's control, and which can be acquired by learning, training and working. For example, if a person is impressed with someone's intellectual merits, practical life and excel-lent morals, he can, by all means, strive to acquire these qualities. This is very desirable, and praiseworthy. As such, the present verse does not contradict it. In fact, the later part of the same verse (32), that is لِّلرِّ‌جَالِ نَصِيبٌ مِّمَّا اكْتَسَبُوا ۖ وَلِلنِّسَاءِ نَصِيبٌ مِّمَّا اكْتَسَبْ , is actually supporting this view. It means that men will get a share of what they acquired with their effort and conduct, and the same will be true for women who will get a share of what they acquired with their effort and conduct. One is not likely to miss the hint here - that effort and struggle in the acquisition of merits and perfections do not go waste. On the contrary, every man and woman will definitely get a return, a share of his or her effort. From here, we also know that desiring to have someone's intellectual-moral excellence as combined with his model practical conduct, and then going ahead to see the fruition of these desires through effort and struggle, is certainly desirable and praiseworthy. Removed in the process here is an error which is committed by a lot of people who tend to do things not knowing what they are doing. Some of them become so devoted to their desire to acquire merits which cannot be acquired that they ruin their otherwise peaceful life right here in this mortal world. And if, bad come to worse, they are fired with envy, that is, they start wishing - 'if I do not have this blessing, may this be taken away from the other' - then, the very chances of salvation in the life to come also stand destroyed because of the grave sin of envy committed by him.

Moreover, there are another kind of people as well who lack courage, avoid action, or just have no sense of honour and shame, who do not even try to acquire merits which can be acquired. Such people, when approached with good counsel, would come back immediately, blaming their destiny and fate which is no more than an effort to camouflage their own timidity and inertia. The present verse has resolved this problem by stating a wise and just rule which is: Man's effort is ineffective in acquiring merits which he does not control, such as, being high-born or handsome. Merits like these should be resigned to fate and one must be content with the divinely determined state he is in, and be grateful to Allah Almighty. Coveting anymore than that is absurd, ineffectual, meddlesome - an act which leaves behind nothing but a handful of sorrows.

As for merits which can be acquired by effort, wishing to have them is useful, only if such a wish is supported by the necessary struggle to achieve. Let us keep in mind that the verse carries the promise that the effort so made will not be wasted and everyone will get a share of what he or she worked for.

Referring back to injunctions prohibiting. the unjust use of someone's property and the unjust taking of someone's life (29), Tafsir al-Bahr al-Mishit points out that this verse aims to seal the very source of these crimes, and it is for this purpose that instructions have been given to stop people from coveting others who are ahead of them in wealth, comfort or influence. A little thought will reveal that theft, robbery and other illegitimate ways of usurping someone's property, or to kill and destroy, are crimes which sprout from one particular emotional attitude. A person, when he finds the other ahead of him in wealth and other material acquisitions, first feels the pinch in his heart wishing to come at par with him, or even wishes to become superior to him. Then, it is the intensity of this desire which pushes him all the way to go ahead and commit these crimes. The Holy Qur'an, as said earlier, has blocked the source of these crime by blocking the very desire of the unacquirables and the unobtainables of life.

To ask for Allah's grace is the ideal way

After that, the verse moves on to instruct by saying: وَاسْأَلُوا اللَّهَ مِن فَضْلِهِ ; (And pray to Allah for His grace). It means, 'when you see someone excel in one or the other graces of life,' the ideal conduct is, 'not to wish to come at par with the other person in respect of that particular excellence, but that you should pray to Allah asking for graces and blessings. from Him.' The reason is that Allah's grace appears in different forms for everyone. For some, wealth is a blessing from God for, if they were to become paupers, they might have fallen victims to sin and disbelief. For some others, grace lies in the very pecuniary circum-stances they are in, for if they were to turn rich, they might have succumbed to thousands of sins. Similarly, for some, grace appears in the form of power and influence, while for some others, the unremembered and the unattended, the grace of Allah manifests itself in that very state. A look at the reality of things around would have told him that power and influence, if these were to be his lot, might have caused his falling into many a sin. Therefore, the verse instructs - when you ask Allah, do not ask for some fixed quality of life, instead, ask for His grace so that He, in his His infinite wisdom, opens the doors of His blessings on you.

Trust His Wisdom and Knowledge

The verse concludes by saying: إِنَّ اللَّهَ كَانَ بِكُلِّ شَيْءٍ عَلِيمًا (Surely, Allah is All-Knowing in respect of everything.) Here, the hint is that the arrangement of things made by Allah Almighty is the very quintessence of wisdom and justice. Whoever has been created and sustained in whatever condition it may be is an arrangement perfectly matched with the ideal demand of wisdom and justice. But, man is not fully aware of the consequences of what he does. This is something only Allah knows best and thus He also knows how suitable it is to keep anyone in a given condition.

The law of inheritance: Reiteration of the wisdom in it

While describing the background in which the present verse was revealed, which appears in the introductory remarks preceding the Commentary, it was stated that some women, when they found out that men have beers given a share equal to that of two women, wished they were men so that they too would be getting a doubled share. In a relevant manner, the law of inheritance was reiterated in the second verse (33) and it was tersely said that all shares determined therein are based on perfect wisdom and justice. Since human reason cannot encompass the totality of factors that contribute to the order or disorder of the created universe, it is obvious that it cannot arrive precisely at those elements of wisdom which have been taken Into consideration in determining the laws of Allah Almighty. Therefore, whosoever has been allotted whatsoever share should be pleased with it, and be grateful for it.

Inheriting through pledge

The giving of a share on the basis of a pledge mentioned at the end of verse 33 refers to a practice during the initial period of Islam. This was later abrogated by the verse وَأُولُو الْأَرْ‌حَامِ بَعْضُهُمْ أَوْلَىٰ بِبَعْضٍ (As for the womb - relatives, some of them are closer to some...) (33:6) Now, if other heirs exist, a pledge or mutual contract between two parties does not affect the inheritance in any manner whatsoever.

Under injunctions concerning women, appearing earlier, discrimination against them by withholding or wasting their rights was prohibited. Now, the present verses describe the rights of men.

Commentary

Verse 34 opens with an important statement: الرِّ‌جَالُ قَوَّامُونَ عَلَى النِّسَاءِ which has been translated as 'men stand caretakers of women.' qawwam, qayyam or qayyim in Arabic denotes a person who holds the responsibility or has the duty and charge to manage a job or run a system or take care of what has to be done about something, controlling all related factors therein. The standard role of a man, with regard to women, has been mentioned in this verse through the word, 'qawwam' which has been translated in various ways, the most common being in the sense of 'hakim' or one who rules, governs, or decides. Other alternates used are guardians, custodians, overseers and protectors. When taken in the sense of a carer, a functional head, and not in the political sense of a ruler or dictator, the 'qawwam' or hakim of the Qur'an offers a base of understanding from common experience. It is obvious that, for any group-living, big or small, or for any organized system, it is rationally and customarily necessary that the group or system have some head or chief or authority so that he can arbitrate in the event of a difference and take decisions to run affairs smoothly. That such authority is needed in the running of countries, governments and states is universally accepted and practiced. This need, as felt in modern times, was also felt in the older tribal social organizations where the chief of a tribe was taken as the authority for that tribe. Why would a family organization, a micro-sample of the larger organizations, would not need someone to head, maintain and run the system? Of course, the need is there and Allah Almighty, in His infinite wisdom, elected men for this responsibility because their natural capabilities are more pronounced than those of women and children.

This is such an open and obvious fact of human life that no sane human being, man or woman, can say no to it; and its denial does not change reality.

The gist of the matter is that, as seen from وَلِلرِّ‌جَالِ عَلَيْهِنَّ دَرَ‌جَةٌ (and for men, there is a step above them) and from الرِّ‌جَالُ قَوَّامُونَ عَلَى النِّسَاءِ (men stand caretakers of women), the message is that the rights of women are as incumbent upon men as the rights of men are upon women, and the rights of both are similar to each other, with only one exception that men have a certain precedence in functional authority, although this too is hemmed with other balancing factors. As explained in other verses of the Holy Qur'an, this mantle of authority placed on the shoulders of men is not that of a dictator and a tyrant. While exercizing this authority, man is bound by the supreme law of Islam, the Shari’ ah. He must act on the principle of consultation and follow good counsel. He just cannot act at. the spur of his whim or his wild instincts. The command given to him is: وَعَاشِرُ‌وهُنَّ بِالْمَعْرُ‌وفِ It mean: Treat women well, as recognized.

This aspect of having mutual consultation appears in another verse (2:233) where it was said: عَن تَرَ‌اضٍ مِّنْهُمَا وَتَشَاوُرٍ‌. Here men have been instructed to act in consultation with wives in family affairs. After this clarification, the technical authority of man should not be a source of heart-burning for women. Still, in view of the probability that women may take this arrangement unhappily, Allah Almighty did not restrict the text on proclaiming the authority of man, but explained two reasons for this authority. One reason relates to the wisdom of creation which is beyond the control of any human being, and the other refers to a factor which comes through one's efforts and endeavour.

The first reason has been mentioned in the words: بِمَا فَضَّلَ اللَّهُ بَعْضَهُمْ عَلَىٰ بَعْضٍ. It means that Allah Almighty has made some excel the others (in some qualities) under His exclusive wisdom and consideration. This is like the sacred environs of Makkah where a particular House of Worship was declared by Allah as His House and Qiblah (the orientation), and in Jerusalem, a special honour was given to the Bayt al-Maqdis. Similar is the case with the precedence of men. This is a God-given grace. Men have done nothing to get it and there is nothing wrong with women that they do not have it. It is simply based on the wisdom of creation, an exclusive privilege of the Creator.

The second reason relates to what is achieved with effort. This reason is pointed out by the words وَبِمَا أَنفَقُوا مِنْ أَمْوَالِهِمْ , which mean that men spend their money, pay dower and take the responsibility of meeting all needs of women. Hence, the precedence.

At this point, a comment from Ibn Hibban in al-Bahr al-Muhit, is worth attention. He says, 'These two reasons in support of the authority of men also prove that the right to authority does not get to be established simply by force. Rather, this right can be deserved on the basis of one's competence and capability.

The Qur'anic eloquence in describing the precedence of men

It is noteworthy that the Holy Qur'an, while giving the first reason for the precedence of men, has not opted for an expression like - فَضَّلَهُمْ عَلَيْهِنَّ : 'because He made men excel women', On the contrary, it has elected to give a deeper significance to the statement by using the expression: , that is, 'made some of them excel the others'. The wisdom here is not difficult to see. The Arabic expression has a subtle indictation to the fact that men and women are part of each other. Therefore, there is a hint that the 'precedence of men, even if proved in one or the other field, will not go beyond being similar to the precedence of man's head over his hand, or of his heart over his stomach. So, just as the precedence of man's head over his hand does not diminish the role and the importance of the hand, similarly, the precedence of man does not cause any lowering of the status of women, because both of them are parts of each other's body - if man is the head, woman is the body.

Some commentators identify yet another hint here. According to them, this precedence men have over women is in terms of genus. As far as individuals are concerned, it is quite possible that a woman may excel a man in her qualities and practical accomplishments, so much so that a woman may be superior to some individual men even in the qualities of a care-taker.

The role of men and women: The principle of function

The second reason given for the precedence of men, is that they spend their earnings to take care of women. Here too, there are some points to ponder. To begin with, it removes the possible doubt that may creep up due to the share of men being twice that of women as described in the verses of inheritance. This is done by the present verse when it declares that all financial responsibilities rest with men. As for women, all her financial responsibilities before her marriage rest with her father and after marriage, these pass on to the husband. With this in view, giving a twofold share to a man is not really too much, for it zooms back to women after all.

Now let us pursue the second hint about an important principle in life. The principle is that woman, in terms of her creation and nature, should not be subjected to go out, work and earn her own 'livelihood. Also, the very attributes of her being are hardly conducive to her running around offices and markets, doing jobs and laborious work to earn a livelihood. So, to keep her safe from roughing it out like men, Allah Almighty has placed her total responsibility on men. Before she is married, her father takes care of her, and after her marriage, she becomes the responsibility of her husband. Woman, as opposed to her sweating it out in the work places in the name of income, career or liberation, has been made the means of human procreation. Then, the responsibility of being mothers of children and that of managing and holding the house and the family together has also been placed on her shoulders. Man cannot handle the burdens of responsibilities in these areas.

Keeping this in view, it is not possible to deduce that the status of women has been reduced by making them dependent on men in the matter of her expenses. There is no value judgment being made here. This is no more than a functional distribution of duties, except that, the inter-acting precedence between duties which exists elsewhere exists here too. In short, the two reasons given show that the precedence of men does not lower the status of women, nor does this hold any special gain for them. Whatever gain there is, it reverts back to women after all.

The profile of a good wife

The verse begins, with a working rule - that man is charged with a duty-bound authority over women. The text then describes women, the فَالصَّالِحَاتُ قَانِتَاتٌ حَافِظَاتٌ لِّلْغَيْبِ بِمَا حَفِظَ اللَّهُ good ones and the bad ones. It says: It means that women who are righteous accept this rule of the precedence of men and obey them, and when they are not with them, they stand guard on their own selves, as well as on what the husband has earned for the family. It goes without saying that the protection of the personal honour and modesty of a woman, and that of everything else in the house under her charge are basic to the happiness that lies behind a successful home management. Although the duty of a woman to guard herself and to look after the home is not restricted to-a situation where the husband is not at home, but is equally applicable during his presence also, yet the Holy Qur'an has mentioned the state of his 'absence' only, because it is in the absence of the husband that a woman is more susceptible to showing negligence; therefore, this situation has been mentioned in express terms. The message is that what has to be avoided is showing a lot of concern and alertness while men are present in the house, but neglecting to abide by these rules of conduct when they are out of sight.

It was, most probably, in explanation of this verse that the Holy Prophet ﷺ said: خیرُالنِساءِ اِمرأِۃُ اِذا ںَظَرَت اِلیھا سرتک ، و اذا اَمَرتَھَا اِطاَعَتکَ ، واِذا غبتَ عَنھا حفظتک فی مالھا و نفسھا

"The best of women is a woman who, when you look at her, makes you pleased with her; and when you ask her to do something, she obeys you; and when you are absent, she guards herself, and her belongings."

Since these responsibilities placed on women, that is, the guarding and protection of their modesty, and of what the husband leaves in her charge, are not that easy to take care of, therefore, Allah Almighty has, immediately after it, declared: بِمَا حَفِظَ اللَّهُ that is, Allah Almighty helps women when they so protect. It is with His support known as the Taufiq of Allah, that they succeed in grappling with these heavy responsibilities. Had this not been there, the temptations of self and satan stand surrounding every man and woman all the time. Then, women are particularly weaker in some areas of capabilities as compared to men, yet, when it comes to carrying out these responsibilities, they tend to be much stronger than men. All this is an outcome of Allah's Taufiq and help. This is the reason why women, as a general rule, are less involved in sinful immodesties as compared to men.

The merit of women who cooperate with their husbands, as evident from this verse, has also been widely reported in several ahadith. In one such hadith, the Holy Prophet ﷺ said that, for a woman who is dutiful to her husband, there are birds in the air and fish in the sea and angels in the skies and beasts in the forests who pray for h forgiveness by the Lord. (al-Bahr al-Muhit)

How to correct an uncooperative wife

The text turns to women who are either straight disobedient to their husbands or fail to cooperate with them in running family affairs in the recognized manner. The Holy Qur'an gives men three methods of correcting their behaviour. These are to be followed in the order they have been mentioned. So, the verse says: وَاللَّاتِي تَخَافُونَ نُشُوزَهُنَّ فَعِظُوهُنَّ ; It means: If you fear or face disobedience from women, the first step towards their correction is that you should talk it over with them nicely and softly. Still, if they remain adamant and do not change their attitude by conciliatory counsel alone, the next step is not to share the same bed with them, so that they may realize the displeasure of the husband as expressed through this symbolic separation, and may feel sorry for their conduct. The Holy Qur'an uses the words: فِي الْمَضَاجِعِ at this point, meaning 'in beds'. It is from here that Muslim jurists have deduced that this staying apart should be limited to 'beds' and not to the 'house' itself. In other words, the woman should not be left alone in the house, something which is bound to hurt her feeling much more and which makes the possibility of further straining of relations far stronger.

A Companion reports:

قُلتُ یا رسول اللہ ﷺ مَا حَّقُّ زوجۃِ اَحَدِنَا عَلَیہِ قَالَ رسول اللہ ﷺ : اَن تُطعِمھا اِذَ اَطعَمتَ وتکسُوھا اِذَا اکتَسَیتَ ، وَلَا تِضرِبِ اَلوَجہَ ولا تَقبّح ولا تھجُر اِلَّا فِی البَیتِ (مشکوۃ، ص 281)

I said: '0 Messenger of Allah, what right do our wives have on us?' He ﷺ said: 'That you feed them when you eat; provide them with apparels to wear when you have these for yourselves; and do not hit the face; and do not say abuses to her; and do not leave them apart unless it be within the house. (Mishkat, p.281)

If this gentle admonition fails to produce any effect, some corrective form of a little 'beating' has also been allowed as a last resort, of course, in a manner that it does not affect the body, nor goes to the undesirable limits of hurt or injury to the skin or bones. As for slapping or hitting on the face, it is absolutely forbidden.

The first two methods of admonition, that is seeking to convince and leaving apart in beds, are more or less an exercise in nobility against arrogant lack of compromise. Prophets and their righteous followers have spoken in favour of it. That they practiced' what they preached is also a proved fact. But, this third method of admonition, that is, beating, has been permitted as a forced option in a particular mode. Right along with this option given to men, it appears in hadith: وَ لَن یَّضرِبَ خِیَارُکُم ; which means that 'good men among you will never beat women.' Thus, such an action is nowhere reported from the blessed prophets of Allah.

According to a narration from the daughter of Sayyidna Abu Bakr ؓ as reported by Ibn Sa'd and al-Baihaqi, the beating of women was absolutely prohibited in the early days, but this resulted in their becoming much too oppressive, following which the permission was reinstated.

The present verse relates to one such event, which can be termed as the background of its revelation. Sayyidna Zayd ibn Zuhayr ؓ had married his daughter, Sayyidah Habibah ؓ to Sayyidna Sa'd ibn Rabi' ؓ During a dispute over something, the husband slapped her. Sayyidah Habibah ؓ complained to her father. He took her to the Holy Prophet ﷺ . He declared that Habibah has the right to hit Sa'd as hard as he did. Hearing this decision of their master, they started back home to take their revenge upon Sa'd. Thereupon, this verse was revealed in which the beating of women as the very last option has been permitted, and no retaliation or revenge against men was allowed. So, soon after the revelation of this verse, the Holy Prophet ﷺ called both of them back and asked them to abide by the injunction from Allah Almighty, and abrogated his first directive permitting the seeking of revenge.

Towards the end of the verse, it is said: 'Then, if they obey you, do not seek a way against them'. It means that should the women mend themselves after that triple-stepped approach, men should forgive and forgo the past events and avoid looking for ways to find fault with them on flimsy issues as the power of Allah controls everything.

Conclusions

What comes out as a basic principle from this verse is that, no doubt the rights of men and women are similar as detailed in previous verses, yet great care has been taken to ensure that the rights of women are duly fulfilled because they are weaker as compared to men and cannot wrest rights from men by using their physical power. But this equality in rights does to mean that there should be no difference of given graces or functional precedences between men and women. That men have been given a degree of precedence over women is a manifestation of Divine wisdom and justice. There are two reasons for it:

1. The genus of man, in view of its mental-physical excellences, has God-given precedence over the genus of woman, which is not possible for the woman to acquire. The case of individuals and rarities is a different matter.

2. Men take care of everything women need from what they earn and have. The first reason given above is something over which men or women have no control, while the second reason is something which becomes operative by choice and effort. It can also be said here that according to the commonsense and justice, there should be two things present while deciding as to who, from among the children of one father and mother, shall be technically authorized to take care of the other. First: Whoever is so authorized should have the mental-physical capability to carry out the demands of authority. Second: The agreement and pleasure of the one to be taken care of under such authority. The first reason mentioned by the Holy Qur'an (in the words : بِمَا فَضَّلَ اللَّهُ بَعْضَهُمْ عَلَىٰ بَعْضٍ ) focuses on the ability of man to function with authority while the second reason (mentioned in the words وَبِمَا أَنفَقُوا مِنْ أَمْوَالِهِمْ ) refers to the agreement and pleasure of the party which would operate under that authority. It is obvious that at the time of marriage when a woman, in consideration of her dower and total maintenance, agrees to enter into the marital bond - she agrees to the authority of the husband and accepts it with pleasure.

In short, the principle of family life given in the first sentence of the present verse is that, despite the rights of men and women being equal in almost everything, there is, for men, a certain precedence laced with authority vis-a-vis women, and they operate thereunder.

Under this basic principle, there came to be two classes of women in practical life. One of them stood by this basic principle, abided by their convenant, accepted the functional authority of man and obeyed him in deference to the wise Divine arrangement. Then there was the other class of women which failed to live by this principle in its fullness. As for the first-mentioned class, it provides for itself a perfect guarantee of family peace and well-being. It needs no correction of course in its life.

Such correction is, however, very much in order for the second class of women. For this purpose, the second sentence of the verse offers a compact system which would help correct things within the four walls of the house and the tussle between the husband and the wife would be diffused and settled for good right there without any third party having to intercede in between them. So, men have been told: If you sense some lack of cooperation from women, the first thing you should do is to talk to them explaining things in a way which helps change their mind and attitude. If that works, the issue is resolved right there. The woman is rescued from a permanent sin and the man from an aching heart, and the two of them from some ever-stinging anguish. Now, if this person-to-person talk fails to bring results, the second stage is to sleep on a separate bed as an indicator of your displeasure, and may be as a device to bring about a change of attitude through the sending of a warning signal. This is ordinary admonition but good enough for a warning. If the woman gets the message, the dispute ends right there. But, if she ignores even this soft measure of correction and persists with her crooked ways, there is the third step in which token beating is also permitted, the extreme limit of which is that it should produce no effect on the body. The use of this method of admonition (beating of woman) was not liked by the Holy Prophet 1 who, quite on the contrary, said that gentlemen would not do that. However, if this token reprimand as the last resort does result in normalcy of relations, the main objective stands achieved anyway. That men have been given three options to correct women in this verse is coupled with the words فَإِنْ أَطَعْنَكُمْ فَلَا تَبْغُوا عَلَيْهِنَّ سَبِيلًا said at the end of it. It means that, should the women start listening to you after these three-step ways of correction, do not go for hair-splitting and start leveling more accusations. The better course is to forgo, realizing that the measure of precedence over women given to you by Allah Almighty is not absolute, for the precedence of Allah Almighty hangs heavy over you. If you exceed the limits set for you, it will be you who is going to take the punishment.

The role of the family arbitrator in disputes

The arrangement described so far was to help tempers cool off within the privacy of the house keeping it restricted to the married couple. But, there are times when the family feud becomes long-drawn. It may be because the woman is temperamentally obstinate and contumacious, or it may be the fault of the man who may have been unjustly oppressive. Whatever it actually is, one thing is certain that the unfortunate tussle will not remain restricted within the four walls of the house; it will _definitely spread out. Then, as usual, supporters of one party wi11 go about maligning the others with all sort of accusations. This will cause tempers of parties to rise and what started as the disagreement of two individuals will turn into a confrontation between two families.

It is to block the road to this terrible discord that, in the second verse, the Holy Qur'an addresses government authorities of the time, the guardians of the parties concerned and their supporters, and the general body of Muslims, and suggests a decent method which would cool down tempers, shut out avenues of accusations and make a compromise between the affected parties possible, so that the dispute which, no doubt, could not remain restricted to the couple's home, would at least be settled within their families and not go to a court of law to become public knowledge.

This particular method requires that concerned officials of the government or the guardians of the parties or a body of Muslims which has the necessary integrity, influence and authority should take charge and appoint two arbitrators to hep bring about a compromise between the parties concerned - taking one arbitrator from the man's family and the other from that of the woman. At both these places, the Holy Qur'an has used the word, "hakam" for these appointees whereby it pin-points the necessary qualifications of these two persons, that is, they should have the capability to decide the dispute between the two. parties; and this capability, as obvious, will be found in a person who is both knowledgeable and trustworthy.

In short, the rule that emerges from here is that a "hakam" or arbitrator from the man's family and another from that of the woman should be appointed and sent to the husband and wife. Now, as for what they are going to do when they meet them and as to what rights they have in this matter - this the Holy Qur'an does not determine. However, it does add a remark at the end: إِن يُرِ‌يدَا إِصْلَاحًا يُوَفِّقِ اللَّهُ بَيْنَهُمَا which means: If these two arbitrators desire to set things right, Allah Almighty will help them bring about harmony between the husband and the wife. So, two things emerge from this sentence:

1. If both arbitrators have good intentions and genuinely wish to bring about peace between the dissenting couple, there will be unseen help from Allah Almighty and they shall succeed in their mission, and it will be through their efforts that Allah Almighty will create love and harmony in the hearts of the couple. This leads to the conclusion that, in cases where mutual rapport is not restored, it may be because one of the arbitrators lacks perfect sincerity while pursuing the goal of peace-making.

2. The purpose of appointing these two arbitrators, as also under-stood from this sentence, is to bring about peace and amity between the husband and the wife and does not include anything beyond that. However, it would be something else if the parties affected by the mutual dispute agree to appoint these two arbitrators as their repre-sentatives and their attorneys in all respects in which case they would be admitting that any decision given by the two arbitrators jointly will be acceptable to and binding on both of them. Under this situation, the two arbitrators shall have absolute authority to decide their case. If both agree on divorce as the solution, they can effect a divorce. If they both decide that the women should be released under khul , a form of dissolution of marriage, the khul' shall come into effect, and their decision shall be binding on the parties. From among the pious elders, this is the position held by Hasan al-Basri and Imam Abu Hanifah. (Ruh ai-Ma ani, etc.)

Cited in this connection is an incident which occurred in the presence of Sayyidna ` Ali ؓ . There too, one finds the proof that the two arbitrators referred to above do not have any intrinsic right other than that of making peace between the husband and wife - unless, of course, the parties concerned authorize them fully to decide as they deem fit. This incident, as narrated by ` Ubaidah al-Salmani, appears in the Sunnan of al-Baihaqi and is being reported below.

A man and a woman came to Sayyidna ` Ali کَرَّمَ اللہ وجھہ along with groups of people accompanying both. Sayyidna ` Ali کَرَّمَ اللہ وجھہ asked them to appoint an arbitrator, one from the man's family and another from the woman's. When arbitrators were appointed, he addressed them both: 'Do you know your responsibility? Do you know what you have to do? Hear me. If both of you agree to keep the husband and wife together and make peace between them, then do it. And if you come to the conclusion that matters cannot be set right between them or that they will not stay right later on, and both of you concur with the option that a separation between them is the expedient course, then do it.' When the woman heard this, she said: 'I accept this. Let these two arbitrators act in accordance with Divine law and I shall accept any decision they give whether it meets my wishes or goes against.' But, the husband said: 'Separation and divorce are things I am not going to accept under any condition. However, I authorize the arbitrators to ask me to pay whatever financial penalty they impose and let my wife return to me in peace.' Sayyidna ALI کَرَّمَ اللہ وجھہ said: 'No. You too should authorize the arbitrators in the same manner as was done by the woman.'

From this incident, some mujtahid Imams deduced the principle that these arbitrators have an inherent authority to divorce as was done by Sayyidna ` Ali کَرَّمَ اللہ وجھہ who asked the parties concerned to do that, while the great Imam Abu Hanifah and Hasan al-Basri رحمۃ اللہ علیہما have taken the position that, had it been an inherent power of the arbitrators to divorce there was no need for Sayyidna ` Ali کَرَّمَ اللہ وجھہ to obtain the authorization from the parties concerned. Here, the very effort to seek the agreement of the parties is a proof of the fact that these arbitrators do not have such an inherent power. Nevertheless, they do become authorized if the husband and wife delegate the necessary authority to them.

This teaching of the Holy Qur'an opens a new outlet of resolving mutual disputes, something which saves people from the botheration of going to courts and government officials and gives them an opportunity to iron out a good deal of their disputes and claims through family-oriented arbitration.

Arbitration in other disputes as well

Muslim jurists say that the appointment of two arbitrators to make peace between two parties in dispute, is not limited to the disputes between a husband and a wife. It can be profitably used in other areas of discord. In fact, it should be so used, specially when the parties involved are related to each other, because a court decision is a short-term solution of the basic problem. at happens after is that such decisions leave the germs of hatred and hostility in the hearts of those affected and which reapear after a passage of time in forms that are much too unpleasant. Sayyidna ` Umar, may Allah be pleased with him, had promulgated an order for his judges which said:

رُدُّوا القضاءَ بَین ذَوِی الاَرحَامِ حَتَّی یصطَلِحُوا فَاِنَّ فصلَ القَضَاءِ یُورِثُ الضَّغَأینَ (معین الحکام، ص 214)

"Send disputes between relatives back to them so that they make peace with the help of each other, as a court decision breeds heart burnings and hostility.

Although this Faruqi directive concerns disputes rising in between relatives, yet, the reason given in this directive (that is, court decisions tend to create hatred and hostility in hearts) is a reason which covers not only the relatives but non-relatives as well. Wisdom lies in saving all Muslims from mutual hatred and hostility. Therefore, the Muslim jurists are of the view that it is appropriate for officials and judges that they, before hearing the cases formally, should make an. effort to find a way out whereby the disputing parties get together and agree on mutual conciliation. (See al-Tarablusi, Mu` in al-hukkam p.214 and also Ibn al-Shahnah: Lisn al-hukkam).

Though brief, yet these two verses present a comprehensive system of family life which, if put into practice, could help eliminate a lot of disputes, hatreds and hostilities from the world. Men and women would live in peace among their families, secure against all those local dissensions which turn into all sorts of tribal, racial, national, even, international feuds.

In the end, let us recapitulate the great Qur'anic mechanism of how to quash family feuds - a virtual gift to the whole world:

1. Resolve family disputes within the house using one method after the other.

2. When this is not possible, government officials or the kinsfolk make peace between the disputing parties through two arbitrators, so that, the dispute does not go out of the larger family circle, even if it goes out of the house itself.

3. When this too is not possible and the matter goes to the court finally, it is the duty of the judicial authority to investigate into the case background of both parties and come up with a decision which is just.

It may be noted that by saying إِنَّ اللَّهَ كَانَ عَلِيمًا خَبِيرً‌ا (Surely, Allah is All-Knowing, All-Aware) warning has been given to the two arbitrators as well to the effect that they should keep in mind that no injustice or crookedness from them will go unnoticed for they shall be appearing before the Being who knows all and is aware of everything.

Sequence

It will be noticed that human rights have remained the main focus of attention since the beginning of the present Surah upto this point. These related to orphans, the women and inheritance. Taken up now are rights of parents, relatives, neighbours and those of human beings in general. Since a perfect fulfillment of these rights is possible only at the hands of a person whose orientation to Allah, His Messenger and to the answerability of the Last Day is correct and strong, and who avoids miserliness, arrogance and affectation, being impediments to all positive efforts, the text presents the need to believe in the Oneness of Allah, to avoid any association with His pristine divinity, and to stay away. from the rejection of the meeting on the Last Day. Also taken to task are ways of the disbelievers who disobey the Messenger of Allah and revel in their miserliness.

Commentary

The reason why Tauhid precedes rights

There are many wise considerations in opening the roster of rights with the exhortation to worship Allah alone and not to associate with Him anything in that worship. One of these, and a basic one indeed, is having the fear of Allah and the conscious concern to fulfill His rights. A person who is' neglectful on that score can hardly be expected to remain particular about fulfilling the rights of anybody else. He will find one or the other excuse to satisfy his immediate circle of relatives and friends, to keep his prestige in the society or to escape the law of the government. What really forces him to honour human rights, watched or unwatched, is nothing but the fear of Allah and the sense of responsibility before Him. This fear and this Taqwa is achieved through nothing but tauhid, the firm belief in the Oneness of A lah to the total exclusion of everything else in that unicity. This is why it was appropriate to remind man about the Oneness of Allah and the need to worship Him before describing the rights of relatives and others.

The rights of parents come first after the message of Tauhid

By taking up the rights of parents immediately after the command to worship Allah as is His due, it is being suggested that, no doubt all blessings and favours are really from Allah Almighty, yet seen in terms of worldly means, the frequency of favours received by man, closest next to those of Allah Almighty, are those he receives from his parents. This is because they are, given the chain of causation, the very fountain-head of their being. And in all those stages of trial from the birth of a child to his young age, the parents are the ones who take care of the being, sustenance and growth of man to the best of their ability and God-given means. This is why the command to worship and obey Allah has also been supplemented with the mention of the rights of parents at other places in the Holy Qur'an. At one place it is said: أَنِ اشْكُرْ‌ لِي وَلِوَالِدَيْكَ (Be grateful to Me, and to your parents.) (31:14). At another place, it is said: وَإِذْ أَخَذْنَا مِيثَاقَ بَنِي إِسْرَ‌ائِيلَ لَا تَعْبُدُونَ إِلَّا اللَّهَ وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا (And when We made the children of Isra'il take a pledge: You shall not worship anyone but Allah; and to parents you shall be good...) (2:83).

In the verses quoted above, the text does not say that one should fulfill the rights of parents or serve them. The word used here is Ihsan (doing good) which, being far more comprehensive, includes spending to support them as needed, to be of service to them physically when so required, not to talk to them in a voice too sharp or too loud causing disrespect, not to say anything to them which may break their heart, and not to treat their friends and well-wishers in any manner which hurts them. On the contrary, one should do everything possible to comfort and please them. Even if the parents have fallen short in fulfilling the due rights of children, the children should never take it as an excuse for their own ill-treatment.

Sayyidna Mu` adh ibn Jabal ؓ عنہ says that, out of the ten things the Holy Prophet ﷺ had asked me to be particular about, one was: 'do not associate anyone with Allah even if you are killed or burnt alive'; and the second was: 'Do not disobey or hurt your parents even if they ask you to leave your children and family.'-(Musnad Ahmad)

Besides the great emphasis laid on obedience to parents and on treating them well as in the sayings of the Holy Prophet ﷺ there are countless merits and grades of reward promised for those who do so: A hadith in al-Bukhari and Muslim reports that the Holy Prophet ﷺ said: 'One who wishes to have his earnings and life increased by the blessing of Allah should fulfill the rights of his relatives.' A narration in Tirmidhi says: 'The pleasure of Allah lies in the pleasure of the father and the displeasure of Allah, in the displeasure of the father.' Al-Baihaqi reports in Shu'ab al-'Iman that the Holy Prophet ﷺ said:, ‘When a son who is obedient to his parents looks at them with love and regard, every glance of his brings forth for him the reward of an accepted Hajj.' According to another narration from al-Baihaqi, the Holy Prophet ﷺ said: 'Allah Almighty forgives most sins but one who disobeys and hurts his parents is condemned to face all sorts of unforeseen troubles right here in this mortal world, much before the ultimate reckoning of the Here after.'

The emphasis on treating relatives well

After having mentioned parents, the verse emphasizes the good treatment of all relatives. A very comprehensive and well-known verse of the Qur'an which the Holy Prophet ﷺ very often used to recite at the end of his sermons, presents the same subject in this

إِنَّ اللَّهَ يَأْمُرُ‌ بِالْعَدْلِ وَالْإِحْسَانِ وَإِيتَاءِ ذِي الْقُرْ‌بَىٰ

Still being recited in the Khutbah during Friday prayers all over the world, the verse means: 'Allah commands you to do justice and be good to all and to fulfill the rights of the relatives. (16:90) ' This includes serving relatives to the best of one's ability, as well as keeping in touch with them. Sayyidna Salman ibn ` Amir ؓ reports that the Holy Prophet ﷺ said: 'Sadaqah, when given to the poor and needy, surely brings the reward reserved for such charity, but, when given to a kinsman, it brings a twofold reward - one for the charitable giving and the other for having fulfilled the rights imposed by kinship.' (Musnad Ahmad, Nasii, Tirmidhi)

Let us keep in mind that the need to fulfill the rights of parents is the first priority followed by that of relatives in general.

The rights of the orphans and the needy

The third group mentioned in the verse is that of 'the orphans and the needy' whose rights were already taken up in some detail earlier in the Surah. But, by recalling it under the general head of relatives, the hint given is that one should consider helping orphaned children and helpless people as necessary as one would do for his or her own relatives.

The rights of the neighbour

Then appears 'the close neighbour' at number four, and the distant neighbour,' at five. The Arabic word, اَلجَار 'al jar' means 'the neighbour'. The verse describes its two kinds - the close and the distant. These two kinds have been explained variously by the noble Companions may Allah be pleased with them all.

Generally, commentators say that 'a close neighbour' is one who lives next to your house, and 'the distant neighbour' is one who lives at some distance from it.

Sayyidna ` Abdullah ibn ` Abbas ؓ said that 'a close relative' means one who is a neighbour and a relative at the same time which makes him the holder of two rights; and 'the distant neighbour' means one who is simply a neighbour and is no relative and who has, there-fore, been mentioned later.

Some commentators have said that 'a close neighbour' is one who is part of the Muslim community and is a Muslim while 'a distant neighbour' refers to a non-Muslim neighbour.

The truth of the matter is that the words of the Holy Qur'an lend to all these probable meanings. It is no doubt reasonable and lawful to have a difference in degrees between different neighbours, either on the basis of their being relative or non-relative, or on the basis of their being Muslim or non-Muslim. However, it is agreed upon that a neighbour, close or distant, related or unrelated, Muslim or non-Muslim, has the essential right that he be helped and cared for to the best of one's ability.

However, a person who has some other right as well, besides his right as a neighbour, he will have a degree of precedence as compared to others. The Holy Prophet has himself explained this when he said: 'Some neighbours have one right, some others have two, still some others have three. The neighbour with one right is a non-Muslim with no bond of kinship; the neighbour with two rights is not only a neighbour but a Muslim too; the neighbour with three rights is a neighbour, a Muslim and a relative, all in one. (Ibn Kathir)

The Holy Prophet ﷺ said: 'Jibra'il has always been telling me to be helpful and caring with one's neighbour, so much so that I started thinking that may be the neighbours will also be included as sharers in inheritance. (al-Bukhari and Muslim)

According to a narration in al-Tirmidhi and the Musnad of Ahmad, the Holy Prophet ﷺ said: 'The best and the most superior is the best in relationship with his neighbours'. And a hadith in the Musnad of Ahmad reports: 'It is not permissible for a neighbour to eat his fill while his next door neighbour is hungry.'

The right of the Companion at your side

Mentioned at number six is 'the companion at your side'. Translated literally, it includes a travel companion sitting by your side in a rail compartment, an aero plane, a bus or a car. It also includes a person who is sitting with you in any common meeting.

The way the Shari’ ah of Islam has made the rights of regular neighbours, close or distant, a matter of obligation, it has likewise made equally obligatory the right of good company enjoyed by a person who sits next to somebody for a little while in some meeting or journey - which includes everyone, Muslim or non-Muslim, related or unrelated, as equals. The instruction to treat such a person nicely is significant, the lowest degree of which is that you cause no pain to anyone with your word or deed, you say nothing which may hurt the feelings of the other person, you do nothing which embarrasses, annoys or troubles him, such as, a puff of cigarette blown towards his face, or a spit of things chewed deposited by his side, or a style of sitting which leaves very little space for the other person to sit.

No wonder, if people started following this instruction of the Holy Qur'an, the common disputes between passengers of trains, particularly in countries with overcrowded modes of transportation, would be all over - if everyone were to think that he needs just about enough space to seat one person. This much is his right, but he does not have the right to occupy anymore space beyond that. The person sitting next to him has as much right to sit in that train as he does.

Some commentators have said that 'a distant neighbour' includes everyone who works by your side in some job or vocation, in industry or wage-earning, in office work, whether on the station of duty, or in travel. (Ruh al-Ma` ini)

The right of the wayfarer

This appears at number seven. A wayfarer is a person who, during your tavel status, comes to you, or becomes your guest. Since this stranger Muslim or non-Muslim has no relative or friend around in the given situation, the Holy Qur'an by considering his predicament as a human being - has made the fulfillment of his right too as something obligatory. It means that one should treat him well, as much as possible and convenient.

The rights of bondmen, bondwomen, servants and employees

Concluding the list at number eight, it is said: وَمَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُكُمْ (and those owned by you) which means bondmen and bondwomen owned. Their right too - that they be treated well - has been made equally obligatory. It means that one should not fall short in making sure that they have food to eat and dress to wear, and also that they are not burdened with jobs beyond their ability to handle.

Though, given the lexical meaning of the verse which is clearly referring to 'the owned', that is, the bondmen and bondwomen, but as based on the same analogy and on the sayings of the Holy Prophet g these rules cover servants and employees as well, for they too have the same right. There should be no niggardliness or delay in giving them their due salary, meals and so forth, and also that they are not burdened with jobs beyond their ability.

Arrogance hinders the fulfillment of rights

The last sentence of verse 36: إِنَّ اللَّهَ لَا يُحِبُّ مَن كَانَ مُخْتَالًا فَخُورً‌ا (Surely, Allah does not like those who are arrogant, proud) is really a unifying complement of what has been said immediately earlier. In other words, anyone falling short of fulfilling the rights of the eight kinds of people serially mentioned earlier, must be none else but the arrogant and the proud - those who have an offensively heightened sense of superiority and those who love lording over others to exact esteem from them. May Allah keep all Muslims safe from it.

There are many ahadith carrying stern warnings against arrogance and pre-Islamic vainglory:

عن ابن مسعود ؓ قال : قَالَ رسول اللہ ﷺ لا یدخل النار احد فی قلبہ مثقال حبَۃ من خردل من ایمان ولا یدخل الجنۃ احد فی قلبہ مثقال حبَّہ من خردل من کِبِر (مشکوۃ ص 433 بحوالہ مسلم)

Sayyidna Ibn Masud ؓ has narrated that the Holy Prophet ﷺ said: 'A person who has in his heart faith worth the weight of a mustard seed will not go to the Hell; and a person who has in his heart arrogance worth the weight of a mustard seed will not go to Paradise.' (Mishkit, p. 433, vide Muslim)

Quoted here is another hadith which also carries a definition of arrogance:

عن ابن مسعود ؓ قال : قَالَ رسول اللہ ﷺ لا یدخل الجنۃ مَن کانَ فی قلبہ مثقال ذَرَّۃ من کِبِر ، فقالرجل ا الرجل یحب ان یکون ثوبہ حسنَا، قال ان اللہ تعالیٰ جمیل یحِّب الجمال، الکبربطر الحق و غمط الناس (مشکوۃ ص 433 بحوالہ مسلم)

Sayyidna Ibn Masud ؓ has narrated that the Holy Prophet ﷺ said: 'Whoever has in his heart arrogance worth the weight of a particle will not go to Paradise. Then, someone asked: 'How about people who like that their clothes be good and their shoes too ... (Is this arrogance?) ' He said: 'Allah is beautiful;-He likes beauty. Arrogance is wanton disregard of the (other person's) right and the holding of people in contempt.' (Mishkit, p. 433, vide Muslim)